Say Ojai, Ohio 3x fast
Who’s on First?
— John Crosby, “The Selfhood of the Human Person”
— Favorite quote ever about day light savings time
You’ve had a busy play day - You’ve wiretapped Mom’s cell phone and e-mail without a warrant, you’ve indefinitely detained your little brother Timmy in the linen closet without trial, and you’ve confiscated all the Super-Soakers from the neighborhood children (after all, why does any kid - besides you, of course - even NEED a Super-Soaker for self-defense? A regular water pistol should be enough). What do you do for an encore?
That’s where the US Air Force Medium Altitude, Long Endurance, Unmanned Aerial Vehicle (UAV) RQ-1 Predator from Maisto comes in. Let’s say that Dad has been labeled a terrorist in secret through your disposition matrix. Rather than just arrest him and go through the hassle of trying and convicting him in a court of law, and having to fool with all those terrorist-loving Constitutional protections, you can just use one of these flying death robots to assassinate him! Remember, due process and oversight are for sissies. Plus, you get the added bonus of taking out potential terrorists before they’ve even done anything - estimates have determined that you can kill up to 49 potential future terrorists of any age for every confirmed terrorist you kill, and with the innovative ‘double-tap’ option, you can even kill a few terrorist first responders, preventing them from committing terrorist acts like helping the wounded and rescuing survivors trapped in the rubble. Don’t let Dad get away with anti-American activities! Show him who’s boss, whether he’s at a wedding, a funeral, or just having his morning coffee. Sow fear and carnage in your wake! Win a Nobel Peace Prize and be declared Time Magazine’s Person of the Year - Twice!
This goes well with the Maisto Extraordinary Rendition playset, by the way - which gives you all the tools you need to kidnap the family pet and take him for interrogation at a neighbor’s house, where the rules of the Geneva Convention may not apply. Loads of fun!
"— Top Rated Amazon review of that Predator Drone I posted a while back
Today I teased DEACON Mark that he ordinarily served as a minister of Communion this morning, and that that he no longer did an extraordinary job like he has in the past.
| Priest 1: | asking about Filipino bamboo pole dancing |
| Priest 2: | Does a random Filipino jig |
| Seminarian 1: | Informs Priest 3 (who just walked in) that Priest 2 was showing us how to pole dance. |
| *Whole room dies laughing* |
I. CAN’T. EVEN.
St. Jizzy of tha Cross
I AM DONE.
This thing is amazing.
I am laughing so hard right now, this is what it did to my nuclear bomb post, I may just put all future posts through this:
Must read fo’ American Catholics, as our crazy-ass asses is constantly busted some lyrics ta dat vaporizin hundredz of thousandz of innocent civilians was a phat muthafuckin thang by tha MSM. Da Church explicitly condemns tha bombings n’ any nuclear action against innocent civilians.
Guess what, muthafucka! Some excerpts:
“Is it ever muthafuckin right deliberately ta take a innocent life, biatch? Our thugged-out asses know from tha natural law n’ from tha Decalogue dat tha answer is no, dat dis is tha sin of murder, which is why Anscombe up in 1956 opposed wit a pamphlet Oxford Universitizzle’s decision ta grant Truman a honorary degree. “For pimps ta chizzle ta bust a cap up in tha innocent as a means ta they endz be always murder, n’ cappin’ is one of tha worst of human actions,” wrote Anscombe.”
“Amazingly, Catholic defendaz of tha atomic bomb, when faced wit dis clear condemnation, argue dat tha paragraph do not specifically name Hiroshima and Nagasaki. It also do not name tha genocizzle of Catholics up in tha Vendée durin tha French Revolution, nor General Sherman’s March ta tha Sea durin our Battle Between tha States, nor tha Tokyo, Hamburg, and Dresden air campaignz of tha Second Ghetto War��”but all of these was deliberate actz of war against civilians, meant ta incite terror, n’ waged against vast civilian populations.”
(Source: xoxoladyloki)
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i cannot contain any emotions.
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when your wife stops by work to bring you an iced mocha—that is love.





